Motherhood is a beautiful, transformative experience, but it can also be challenging. Whether you’re navigating sleepless nights with a newborn or juggling school runs with a growing family, the emotional and physical demands can feel overwhelming. While the love and joy children bring are immeasurable, the stresses of motherhood are real and can sometimes leave you feeling isolated—especially if you don’t have whānau or close friends nearby to lend a hand.
A supportive community is important for every mother’s wellbeing. Being part of a network of like-minded people who understand what you’re going through can make all the difference. While creating a community might seem daunting if you’re far from home, there are many ways to build meaningful connections. Here’s some ideas on how to nurture your motherhood wellbeing by finding or creating your village, even when you’re new to an area or don’t have immediate family support.
The Power of Community in Motherhood
Motherhood is not just about caring for your child; it’s also about caring for yourself. Many mothers can relate to the isolation that can come with caring for young children. While it can be tempting to try to handle everything alone, research shows that social support is vital for both emotional and physical wellbeing.
Having a community helps in numerous ways:
- Emotional Support: A strong support system provides a safe space to share frustrations, joys, and everything in between. Just knowing you’re not alone in your experiences can lift a huge weight off your shoulders.
- Practical Help: Whether it’s a friend helping with babysitting, swapping playdates, or sharing parenting tips, having practical help can make daily tasks much easier.
- Shared Experiences: Being part of a community with others who are in the same boat lets you know that your struggles and triumphs are completely normal. This camaraderie helps you grow stronger as a mother.
- Mental Health Benefits: Having people to talk to, laugh with, and cry with helps reduce stress and supports mental health. For many mothers, building these connections is crucial to avoiding burnout.
Building a Community: Tips for connecting with others
If you live without family nearby, you may feel unsure about where to start when it comes to building your own support network. But rest assured, there are plenty of opportunities to connect with others, whether you’re in a bustling city or a smaller rural town. Here are some practical steps you can take to nurture connections and build your community:
- Join Local Parenting Groups
New Zealand has a rich variety of online and in-person parenting communities. Facebook, Meetup, and even local community boards offer groups where mothers can meet others in their area. Search for groups in your region, such as “Mums in Wellington” or “Taupo Mums” to find women who are in similar life stages and share interests. - Antenatal Group
An antenatal group offers invaluable support for new mums, as babies born around the same time create strong, relatable bonds. Many new mums share that they initially felt they had little in common with their antenatal classmates—until the baby arrived, and everything changed. - Attend Playgroups and Events
Playgroups are fantastic for connecting with other mums while your children socialise. Local libraries, community halls, and early childhood centres often host regular playgroups. You can also look for local events, such as parent-child activity mornings or family-friendly festivals, which are great places to meet people. - Explore Breastmates.co.nz
Not only does this site provide helpful blogs on everything from breastfeeding to self-care, it also provides a vibrant community of mothers who are ready to offer support, share experiences, and offer advice. If your question isn’t answered, please reach out and we can seek answers from the community for you. - Follow and Engage with Social Media Communities Breastmates is active on Facebook and Instagram. By following Breastmates on social media, you can engage with posts, ask questions, and join in the conversations with other mothers who are sharing their experiences. Social media is a great way to form connections, even if you’re not meeting people face-to-face.
- Check Out Community Centres and Local Groups
Many local community centres in New Zealand offer family-oriented services and events. From craft sessions to parenting courses, there’s usually something happening in your area. These gatherings are often relaxed, welcoming environments where you can meet other parents. Keep an eye on local noticeboards or websites for these opportunities. - Get Involved in Your Child’s School or Daycare
Your child’s school or daycare is another potential place to form connections. Attend school events, parent-teacher meetings, or even volunteer for school activities. This provides opportunities to meet other parents, and helps you connect in with your child’s learning. - Connect Through Religious or Cultural Groups
If you are part of a particular faith or culture, there are likely to be local religious or cultural groups that offer support. Many churches, mosques, and cultural centres host family-friendly events, parenting workshops, or casual meetups. These are great spaces to connect with others who share your background and values. - Volunteer in Your Community
Volunteering is a powerful way to meet like-minded individuals while contributing to your community. Whether it’s helping out at a local event or joining a charity group, volunteering can create meaningful bonds with others while also giving back.
Building a community doesn’t happen overnight. It requires time, patience, and consistency. You might not find your “village” right away, but if you keep showing up, whether online or in person, you’ll eventually meet people who are looking for the same kind of connection.
Remember, you don’t have to go through motherhood alone—there’s a community waiting for you to join, whether online or in person.
So, take the first step today: reach out, ask a question, or simply share a moment with another mum. You’ll find that the journey of motherhood becomes a little easier, and a lot more rewarding, when you have a village behind you.
